Perils of Caffeine in the Evening

A few years ago, I was doing some work in North Carolina at a plant that processed turkeys.  They’d bring them in by truck, hang them by their feet on the conveyor you see inside the door, stun them and send them on their way to fulfill their low-fat mission in Subway shops, and in your refrigerator.

This was by far the largest business in town, and almost its raison d’etre.  Yet the city limits sign, superimposed, proclaimed it a “bird sanctuary”.  Turkeys aren’t the smartest things in creation in the first place.  How many of them, dear reader, do you imagine approached the city limits, satchels in their hand and hope of a better life in their countenance, read the sign (if they could) and exclaimed, “Hallelujah!”?

“Now Hiring” were undoubtedly the last words these plucky adventurers ever read.