Game Over

Struggling up out of the murk of sleep this morning and shedding the patina of dream residue (I usually never remember my dreams), a bit of flotsam remained that could both make my fortune and open the exciting world of video gaming to us sedentary sods who have trouble winning at MS Solitaire.

It’ll be called The Editorial Wii.  Wielding the Wii remote like an angry red pencil, the player will slash furiously as a stream of execrable prose comes at him from the console.  Points will be awarded for sniffing out “lead” for “led”, “It was a dark and stormy night”, “A pirate ship appeared on the horizon” and “share with you”.  One of the buttons on the remote will plant “awk” adroitly on clumsy passages.

An advanced version of the game, and something that will get some hardware sales going, will feature electrodes at the end of each finger and thumb.  With these, the player can indulge the play-editor’s greatest fantasy, air-typing withering rejection letters.

I think I’ve really nailed it this time - leave your congratulations in the comments, and start nursing your jealousy.

Unless I’m mispronouncing “Wii”.


  1. Will there be a follow up game called Royal Wii?

  2. Carroll:

    I think you really might be on to something with this one!

  3. Phil:

    Kathy - Great idea! Use the remote for summary beheadings and instant knighthood. X-rated version of the game lets you use it to beget male heirs.

    Carroll - you wanna be an angel investor? My aunt in Nigeria is handling the finances. You’ll receive an email from her soon.

  4. um…is this a continuation of halloween? no? well then. go for it. my internal editor longs for, nay, lusts for, a proofreaders’ laser excalibur. how much voltage are you considering?

  5. Cathleen:

    I’ve had some great laughs this evening. Oddly, I started out searching inspirations for building my own bookcase. I got to a search of “driftwood furniture” and landed here at “Perils of Caffeine in the Evening.” Not a GPS route, but I’ll be able to find my way home. :)

    All that said, I’m sending this game idea to my favorite writing instructor. I know it’ll bring her a smile after her latest round of imparting English wisdom to bored teenagers in the GED program at the local community college.